NYU Law Student Hikes Graduation Ticket Price By 5000%

New York, NY. One enterprising young NYU Law student, Martina Scolnit, has decided to get an early start on her student loan debt by re-selling her graduation tickets. Though some graduating students are able to include all their loved ones through the four tickets given to them by the administration, other students with larger circles of friends and families have been forced to beg or buy additional tickets.


“No, I don’t see anything wrong with profiting off of my fellow law students,” explained Scolnit when questioned by reporters. “I mean it’s a free market. I’m just asking students to pay exactly what they think it’s worth for their grandmother to attend their graduation. I know Nana just had surgery, but I have to think about number one.”


Though some argue that Scolnit’s actions are “selfish” or “slimy”, Scolnit continues to maintain her confidence. “Actually, I don’t know where this 5000% number is coming from, since I got these tickets for free. Technically speaking, it’s a limitless price hike,” commented Scolnit.


In a move that shocks no one, Scolnit confirmed that she was not, in fact, going into public interest after graduation.

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